Dear God,
I read the first part of Corinthians chapter 11 for the plain reason that I should have something to write. Am I evil in that respect? You don't need to answer that because I already know.I should read the Bible more...I don't really know why I don't. All of the Christians I know read the Bible for duty, but I didn't want to be one among them, I wanted to be a person who actually read the Bible because she liked it. That's why I stopped reading the Bible in the first place, in an attempt to be more true to myself. A couple years later, here I am, reading the Bible once again for the sake of writing about it, but I think I was wrong the first time. I shouldn't have quit Bible reading until I found it enjoyable, I should have read the Bible until I enjoyed it.
Why isn't the Bible interesting? It is just as capable of any book when it comes to impressiveness...I don't know what it is that turned me off it those years ago. The one thing I can say about it is Paul's language which is a bit confusing; he questions and answers, and it's all so mixed up. But I like how heartfelt it is. Sometimes, I find his language too strong, too full of feelings, and it surprises me quite a bit. But these are not deal-breakers, I know these could not have been the reason for my Bible-reading-hiatus. I must have found the Bible boring before, but I assure you I can handle it now (I mean, if people can read the Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, and War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy, I can read the Bible).
I suddenly thought that I don't read the Bible enough because I "don't have time," but I had time for a whole day of reading Mansfield Park by Jane Austen yesterday. Why would I not be as drawn to the Bible as I am to Jane Austen? Perhaps it's because I am scared of what I am going to learn in the Bible? Scared that all my ways are condemned...I'm scared that I'm doing everything wrong, and prefer to be partially ignorant of my failures...But I already know about what is wrong and right (in both words' crudest senses).
I know not what makes me repel the Bible. My children's Bible was always so very interesting, but my real Bible...it was a bit long, and harsh, but that was back when I read the Bible word-for-word. I have no defenses left. I have no reason to not read the Bible.
Please help me just read it.
Cheers.
I read the first part of Corinthians chapter 11 for the plain reason that I should have something to write. Am I evil in that respect? You don't need to answer that because I already know.I should read the Bible more...I don't really know why I don't. All of the Christians I know read the Bible for duty, but I didn't want to be one among them, I wanted to be a person who actually read the Bible because she liked it. That's why I stopped reading the Bible in the first place, in an attempt to be more true to myself. A couple years later, here I am, reading the Bible once again for the sake of writing about it, but I think I was wrong the first time. I shouldn't have quit Bible reading until I found it enjoyable, I should have read the Bible until I enjoyed it.
Why isn't the Bible interesting? It is just as capable of any book when it comes to impressiveness...I don't know what it is that turned me off it those years ago. The one thing I can say about it is Paul's language which is a bit confusing; he questions and answers, and it's all so mixed up. But I like how heartfelt it is. Sometimes, I find his language too strong, too full of feelings, and it surprises me quite a bit. But these are not deal-breakers, I know these could not have been the reason for my Bible-reading-hiatus. I must have found the Bible boring before, but I assure you I can handle it now (I mean, if people can read the Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, and War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy, I can read the Bible).
I suddenly thought that I don't read the Bible enough because I "don't have time," but I had time for a whole day of reading Mansfield Park by Jane Austen yesterday. Why would I not be as drawn to the Bible as I am to Jane Austen? Perhaps it's because I am scared of what I am going to learn in the Bible? Scared that all my ways are condemned...I'm scared that I'm doing everything wrong, and prefer to be partially ignorant of my failures...But I already know about what is wrong and right (in both words' crudest senses).
I know not what makes me repel the Bible. My children's Bible was always so very interesting, but my real Bible...it was a bit long, and harsh, but that was back when I read the Bible word-for-word. I have no defenses left. I have no reason to not read the Bible.
Please help me just read it.
Cheers.
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